*Club music* ‘excuse me, ‘excuse me. Sorry. Sorry. Coming through! I just need to… get Sorry. I need to- Just get around. Okay. *CRUSH* OW, MY DICK!!!! Ow, oooo! Owie!!!! Ow, my dick…. Did you hurt my dick? Was it you? It got hurt real bad just a minute ago over there on the dance floor! *Cries* Now it hurts real bad!!! Did you hurt my dick?! -Step off, dick! -No! I think someone stepped on it!!! Was it you?! My dick got hurt real bad!!! You seem like the kind of guy that would hurt someone’s DICK!!! -Get up off my lady, bro, or I’ll give you something to cry about! -I already have that! It’s my dick and it hurts! That’s why I’m crying already. My hurt dick… Was it you?! Did you hurt my dick? I promise I won’t be mad if it was you, but you have to tell me… -What about your dick?! Hey, this ain’t that kind of club, bro! Get bent! -It’s already bent! *Cries* Oooo!!! Punch me anywhere but my dick! I don’t think it could sustain another blow… *Guy walks away* Someone is this club hurt my dick and I’m having a hard time identifying them!! Can you use your PA system to address the whole crowd at once and ask them who it was?! Hey, hey!!! Somebody hurt my dick!!! -SOMEBODY HURT MY DICK!! ♫ *Somebody hurt my dick remixed* -Did you hurt my dick? Did you hurt my dick? Did you hurt my dick? Ow, ow! My dick, ow! Did you hurt my dick!? Oooo, ow! Was it you? I promise not to judge you too harshly. Tell me. TELL ME!! *Cries of pain in the distance* -Did you hurt my tits? Did you hurt my tits? -Did you hurt my dick? -Did you hurt my tits? -It hurts real bad. If it was you, I promise I won’t be mad. -I just need you to tell me… Ooh, -HEY, SHUT THE FUCK UP!